High school will always be remembered by the memories I have in baseball. From my teammates to my achievements in the game, I will forever love the game. One day I hope to play in college and make even more memories. I have been talking to a representative from Thomas college and I hope to play there. If I can play baseball in college it will be a win for me. If I can't play in college I will find some way to stay attached to the game. I would love to coach kids one day and manage a team of my own. Baseball will always provide me with life opportunities. I love the game with everything I got and just can't wait for the season to start!!! Baseball is my religion!!
Wow, you are a baseball LOVER! I get it. It's our life, religion, passion. Glad you've found all that on the field. I have some pretty great memories of softball myself.
ReplyDeleteHere's the issue. It's hard to read and it's short. I'm not sure by how much, maybe 100, maybe 150 words. You might check. Also, without those paragraph breaks, it feels like you jump around a lot (and it's hard to read because there's no space between all this writing).
You get a little repetitive toward the end. You're a great story-teller, Dylan. Can you tell us a story? Give us some stories about baseball, your favorite memories from your experience or fave baseball players. Tell us a story soap on a rope.